The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Send help, water and tortillas.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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