i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
We had sex on a dog bed..
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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