Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
How drunk are you??
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
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i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
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The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.