I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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