What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
