i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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