grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
