He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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