next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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