planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
