There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize