It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
