In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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