Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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