I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
