if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize