i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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