We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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