I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
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they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
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Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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