It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
