stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
