maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
