His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
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I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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