Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
