I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
your room smells of hookers.
And success
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
