Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
