For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I did not marry a roomba.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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