he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Randomize
