I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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