This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
