Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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