why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize