Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize