Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.