I just pynch a tree in the face
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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