just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
