i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
