she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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