I must be too annoying 4 u.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
