he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
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she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
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Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that