you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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