So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
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