this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
