Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
