wanna go halves on a baby?
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
