just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
