Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
