Pappa wants mamma naked
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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