Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
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we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
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do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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