i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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